When the status quo doesn’t cut it

“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.”
Paulo Coelho, The Devil and Miss Prym


Sometimes I become rather frustrated, or perhaps fed up is a far better word, with the day-to-day grind of my life and job.


I never thought myself much as an adventurer. Then I look back at my life and realize, well…maybe I was.


My heart is a restless vagabond, yearning for something more exciting, stable but different. Mid-life crisis? Maybe…I’ve been this way my entire life.


“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
– Mark Twain


A loner, a wanton observer of life, I become wrapped up with my inner world and at times with those individuals and events who happen to cross my path.


Very difficult to give my heart to just anyone…and traveling helps clear the mind.  Trust has always been an issue.  I don’t give it out freely and once broken it is near impossible to gain back. Sometimes when this bond is broken, I wonder if it’s even worth trying to fix. Because if it breaks again, at least for me….I don’t go back to pick up the pieces. (Laughter) though easier said than done, sometimes we are all faced with immeasurable challenges which seem to come out of no where and punch us in the gut.

There are times I want to pack up my bags and head to parts unknown where no one knows me and I can be swept up in blissful anonymity.

“I believe in following your wanderlust to your bliss and living life to the fullest; every aspect of my life seems to flow from that basic ambition. My yen for travel is a metaphor for my quest for knowledge. I sing in the key of freedom, and that has definite implications for my love life. I want to see too much of the planet and its peoples to be anything but a nomad.” (Bohemian Vagabond)

Going back home…

This weekend am off to visit beloved friends in the Hoosier state.  A MUCH needed getaway.

I am a homebody though, ironically, this homebody has seen the world….it’s always nice to be able to “come home again.”

I lost touch with old high school friends….made new ones through the miracle of social media…and am eager to open a new chapter in my life…time to step out of my usual comfort zone and embrace the unknown.

Growing up among the cornfields of Indiana as a mixed child was very difficult, and why I never desired to return.  However, through the years, surviving hardships and heartache, I have come to realize people do change…and some for the better.

One thing I have learned in my years of travel is that home is where your heart is and it can be back in Indiana, Missouri or overseas….

“Home wasn’t a set house, or a single town on a map. It was wherever the people who loved you were, whenever you were together. Not a place, but a moment, and then another, building on each other like bricks to create a solid shelter that you take with you for your entire life, wherever you may go.”
Sarah Dessen, What Happened to Goodbye

Heading to parts unknown

“The passion for travelling is, I believe, instinctive in some natures. We have seen men persevere in their enterprises against the most formidable obstacles; and, without means or friends, and even ignorant of the languages of the various countries through which they passed, pursue their perilous journeys into remote places, until, like the knight in the Arabian tale, they succeeded in snatching a memorial from every shrine they visited.”  
―     James Holman

All of us have a little bit of the adventurous spirit….if you don’t, take a good long hard look in the mirror and ask you if you’re satisfied with status quo, with your life.

Are you a free spirit? Not afraid to test life’s boundaries?

Looking back on my life’s adventures I realize that I have a bit of the vagabond deep within me. Despite my commonplace beginnings I was most fortunate in my fortitude to have tasted the sweet sublime of international travel.

It’s been a glorious 45 years, meeting people from South Korea, United Arab Emirates, Oman, Canada, Puerto Rico, Mexico, and even here in the US of A. Wonderful memories.

I feel that itch again…wanting to pack up my bags and not look back once into my rearview mirror——heading into the sunset, parts unknown.  What an intriguing thought…………………..


1395273_10202136938045396_506576641_nLeaving the city and rat race behind was something I sorely needed this week.  Hard work week, dealing with the government shut down, lost a reserve paycheck due to the Capital Hill fiasco, coming out to the country with my hubby, Mr. H. was just what the doctor ordered.


Growing up in Indiana I was darn lucky to have a pretty decent childhood.  Almost Norman Rockwell in some ways.  I miss living in the country, no sirens, barely any crime, the people there, at least to me, are far more friendlier.  Here in the city everyone and everything is in a rush.  Living in St. Louis you are dealing with crime, poverty, and a population density I never got used to, (especially with traffic.)

Being out there with the hubby, just he and I was every wife’s dream.  We had each other and that was heaven.  Maybe because we’re technically still newlyweds we are still pretty much caught up in each other.  All spouses should be, for the entire marriage.  Keep that love alive.  🙂
All partners should take a trip out to someplace holding little distractions except with each other and simply let the world slip away and make great memories.  ❤

Distance is relative

LILIESGrowing up I was lucky to have  parents who were able to afford overseas trips and by overseas trips in this case I mean Puerto Rico.  Roughly every other summer my mom would pack our bags and off we went for 3 months of cultural immersion.

Dad, the workaholic that he was, typically would spend that time away from family at Indland Container Corporation.  His weekends were either spent on his motorcycle, fishing, or hanging out with friends. (every married guy’s dream.)

I never heard from either parent whether or not the other was missed but dad would call every week.  I liked the break because it meant something different, playing with cousins, going to the beach, eating PR food and not having to face Mr. Disciplinarian.

Irregardless, I always wondered if my parents DID miss each other…I guess after so many years of marriage they took each other for granted.  Dad did his thing, mom did hers.  I never thought I would end up marrying someone who ended up many miles from home.  And if I even had the faintest inkling that I would…..I always thought *I* would be the deployable one.

When you love someone and they leave, you keep close their memories, their love.  And with that you’re never truly alone but tell that to the heart when days…nights go by and you face each and every one of them alone, you go to bed alone and wake up in the middle of the bed not worrying about stealing the covers or taking up too much room but you miss that worry. And you wonder, as I at times did….had mom ever miss dad’s presence all those years ago…because I know she does now and he isn’t back home in Indiana waiting for his family to return from the island.  But he remains, he remains in our hearts and this is something I never take for granted. And as much as I miss my husband I wonder the impact of his death would mean to my heart if he were the first to go. Love is beautiful but also very painful.  But I try to hold on to the joy it brings, because love does indeed make life beautiful………

Death is nothing at all. It does not count. I have only slipped away into the next room. Nothing has happened. Everything remains exactly as it was. I am I, and you are you, and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged. Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. Call me by the old familiar name. Speak of me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference into your tone. Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name be ever the household word that it always was. Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it. Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was. There is absolute and unbroken continuity. What is this death but a negligible accident? Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just round the corner. All is well. Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before. How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!
Henry Scott Holland
Canon of St Paul ‘s Cathedral


Vacation Time!!

Off to the East Coast….and Canada. Looking forward to putting yet another state to place under my belt putting my travels at 40.  Passport is packed and ready to visit Canada again. Years ago I was there (near Niagra Falls)…..excited….had a long ass week with my regular 9-5 and then drill.

Going to work on my 61 page officer packet….seeking a direct commission in the health services field.  Something I wanted to enter for years.

I wish everyone a wonderful week…sorry haven’t updated my blog in awhile, but plan to be more productive once I return. 😉

Traveling etiquette

I have literally been flying my entire life. Since I was approximately 1 year of age.  I have come to realize that some people feel that they are entitled to act like a jack ass when traveling.  Like this morning for instance.  I have been up since 3am and hate flying anyway…well–since 9/11 I have.

I sat in my seat and was minding my own business when one of the passengers who came to sit right beside me acted like the airline should cater to him….including the passengers who were sitting next to him. Never mind that it’s early (flight left at 6:3oam) and most people want to sleep and not deal with any diva drama.  I had my sunglasses and with my non-verbals put them on to go to sleep which also signaled to this irritating man to leave me alone.

fly the friendly skies

I guess he didn’t get the hint because he proceeded to lecture the passenger beside him how I must be anti-social and should transfer to 1st class with my attitude.  Well, after that remark I did get a WTF attitude and pretty much put him in his place for bothering me when I was so ever kind to not even bother him except to say a courteous “hello” when he came to sit down.

Then he proceeded to annoy the stewardress and I was like hmm…obviously this man has issues.

So when you travel bring a pair of sunglasses. They help to deter further annoying intrusions on your trip if confronted by a diva….and if you are one of those inconsiderate passengers who 1.) invade another passenger’s space or 2.) think that the passenger next to you simply has to hear everything you have to say..think again….some of us simply want to sleep and get to our destination.

Different worlds…

It’s awesomely amazing at the cultural (or sub-cultural) differences we can find in this grand nation.  And one thing I absolutely love about living in America (and honoring her birthday) is the vast diversity you can find here.  Being in Miami is almost like visiting a different country from the architecture to the plant-life to the people.  I am having a wonderful time with my family and simply soaking in the sun and everything around me.

What I love about my country are her people and the love I have for the differences I find in my travels simply within her borders.

Happy birthday America.  God bless you always!

Welcome to Miami

Off to Miami for a few days.  Will be great to see family again.  Once in awhile I simply have to get away from here but it’s always nice coming home……………

Enlistment packet made it through battalion now simply waiting to hear back from my recruiter when I return.