An illusion of love

Separation from your spouse is one of the most difficult experiences.  All of us take love for granted. We assume the object of our affection will always be there.  But as we all know we have a one way ticket off this planet and we have to make the best of this journey called life.

Once in awhile, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale.
— Author Unknown

When we choose to marry someone we give ourselves over to everything about this person including their job.  Dealing with a deployment isn’t easy.  It’s a chore in patience and trust.  You spend countless days without them. And yes, it’s normal feeling sorry for yourself, to cry, vent, to feel frustrated.  It comes in waves.

The loneliest of times are at night.  The darkness seems to embrace the solitude and you look over to the other side of the bed and it’s empty.  So you hug your pillow tighter hoping he is thinking about you, missing you as much as you miss him.  Almost like a romance gone awry.

All you have to hold on to are memories, promises, and feelings.  There are going to be times your arms will physically ache to embrace him, to feel that reassurance.  You may at times start to doubt yourself, if this separation is worth all the pain and loneliness.  You start to wonder if he will keep close to his heart the vows both of you promised each other.

When you begin to feel this way remember the love which binds the two of you together.  When you’re separated you may feel this experience is simply a fantastical illusion because he isn’t here.  Trust may become the most difficult thing you can hold on to but if you don’t then what’s left?

Love isn’t easy.

It means work and lots of it.  Go ahead and shed your tears, but know that he chose you for a reason and that choice was real.


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