I’ve posted quite a bit on relationships. Simple fact….being in one can be quite scary. I say this because when you fall in love you tend to lose a little bit of yourself and when you’ve been single as long as I have by choice it’s daunting to think about letting a piece of myself go.
A key to how healthy you view yourself in this relationship (at least to me) is how you see oneself.
When you are with this person is your image distorted like a funhouse mirror? Meaning your sense of self is exaggerated to the point you don’t recoginze “you” any more? When you look in the mirror do you see yourself or your partner? Where have “you” gone?
It’s important to realize that yes, a relationship takes two people to make it work, that when you are committed you are almost a blend of each other but don’t become so lost in the glory of love that you don’t recognize yourself anymore.
What were you like before the two of you met?
Is that person still there?
Or hidden behind a lot of self-doubt, denial, and bitterness?
Then you should examine as to whether or not this relationship is the right fit for you. (See my other post regarding this topic)…..in the end you have to make damn sure you don’t get so lost in this newness of love that you forget who and what you are. Your partner fell in love with you for a reason. Don’t feel the need to tailor yourself into this perfect individual…because then it becomes forced—-faked. Be yourself, and let everything else fall into place (naturally)